40 years stone hard

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We walked the alley way from the post office to the boulevard
had some papers in our hands, some vegetables, and a few bulbs
straight from the lottery to the fort…
I’d never have guessed I was innocent then…
having seen spilt blood, and dreams dashed, and hopes splashed
having crossed oceans, seen souls lost at sea…
with pictures of the war tattooed on the backs of my eyelids…
still biting my lip as we lay on the sands at the shore…
the taste of vomit in our mouths having rocked and rolled
on treacherous waves in a nutshell built for two
wasn’t it clear then… and perfect… that I had made it out with you
and with all of life behind me… still starting out from scratch
so confident, we were inspired… it was on the natch
like a ball as fast as fate itself, shot from hell and headed for home…
blue skies above, we were sure footed… and our aim was true…
and yes I said it then… cause I really, really, really, loved you

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the passion was still there when we reached our wedding bed
despite all the fears and frustrations… and the children to be fed
shouts and screams, suds and splintered glass on the floor
as we danced between the splinters
secured wooden window frames with a plastic latch…
there were still dreams then… in the waking hours of the morn…
and there was love overflowing, taken for granted… taken out the door
you followed me to the bus stop, and we said goodbye afresh
till night followed work, and dark followed light,
head to head about money, ceremony, and circumstance…
arguing respect and fighting ‘bout freedom,
about navigating by the map and keeping our heads above water
we came together, and we came apart… and back again
we wore out our shoes, we wore out our hearts
we withstood our aches, we outlasted plans
and the dripping faucets, and the hours too late,
and what had to be said, and the weariness in bed
don’t these walls echo those days and nights unexplained
the fury of lonesome togetherness and misery unknown
redeemed by an unexpected kiss, by your hand on my breast
in this home that held us together through storms and summer days
how could I possible bid farewell to these walls…

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these stone walls that held our lives together
that held our mistakes, our wide eyed innocence, and our sins…
our tuna salad on cracker thins…
the old typewriters and the film cameras, wooden tables and lamps
the music of years gone by… still floating through the air
and the words read from newspapers on Saturday afternoons
drifting off to sleep, dulled by written explanations to the heart of bliss
how do we pack our moving crates with this…?
I swore I’d never leave these walls alive
never knowing what it’d feel like after 40 years
it’s a good day to die, I said as I walked in
is there anything to say as I walk out
anything that tells the story as well as those two words
that sit like a crown at the head of my blog,
you know, ‘home’ and ‘about’.

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45 responses to “40 years stone hard

  1. Such powerful words, Shimon, a lifetime of memories between the lines. Saying goodbye to home, such a hard thing. Are you moving?

  2. Oh dear Shimon, this is so beautiful and so impressive… especially the last lines, “…you know, ‘home’ and ‘about’…. But also hit me sadly, are you going to move…? Thank you, Blessing and Happiness, love, (love you so much) nia 🙂

  3. I’m lost for words after reading yours.I like the poem greatly

  4. Powerful words from the heart that tell a story over many years carrying many emotions. But I still wonder about one word – Why? I sense a separation, but I don’t know of what. Then again, you may be just looking ahead. Nonetheless, very well done!

  5. “how do we pack our moving crates with this…?” I think you have packed them in this poem Shimon. As always wishing you well.

  6. “we wore out our shoes, we wore out our hearts” – this is a monumental piece of writing, and I mean this in every sense, Shimon. It is you and yet timeless at the same time – like an old inscription uncovered by chance in the desert sands…

  7. Emotional, powerful, and intensely beautiful. Your words dance and weave around the chairs and meals and memories of a house that is very much a home. I greatly enjoyed reading this Shimon, thank you.

  8. Such words, Shimon…evocative, full of life, all yours and all ours…so familiar. Beautifully rendered memories.

  9. Beautiful poem, full of soul and life. Sorry you are leaving your old home – hope your new one will be filled with joy.

  10. I feel the life within those walls, Shimon, through your words.

  11. Dear Shimon,
    This is beautifully written, infused with the wisdom and truth and both the joy and sorrow of a lifetime. I believe this piece is the most powerful and compelling of yours that I have ever read. Thank you for sharing it.

  12. What a hauntingly beautiful poem Shimon, yet so very heartbreaking too. I can imagine how emotional you felt when writing this. Many lines here are floating around my mind, and will for a while I think.

    Are you leaving your home or is the post inspired by the home and about? I kind of suspect the latter but maybe there is a separation here with a partner.xxxx

  13. I don’t have the right words to express my feelings. A deep poem which contains all the sensations that a man can prove… between dreams and reality, beside happiness and sorrow… just “life” as human being feel it!

  14. My heart bleeds for you … not just pain … but also love … for many reasons … I’m not Jewish, just a poor gypsy descendant … we suffered much the same … Love always, cat.

  15. A wonderful poem, an ode to a love built and grown within walls of stone, but clearly greater than those walls – a love that goes with you everywhere.

  16. LadyBlueRose's Thoughts Into Words

    your four walls held much life…and someone will always hear their whispers
    for they are etched in stone with one’s breath…
    Beautiful poem…you have scripted words that are from your heart language
    what a beautiful haunting song you have created …full of life, and mystery of where “home and about” is going from here…
    Take Care Shimon….You Matter….
    )0(
    maryrose

  17. Wonderful imagery, Shimon. So many thoughts, so many rabbit trails to chase.

  18. Such powerful words made even stronger by the rhythm. Whatever these words mean, I wish you very well.

  19. “and there was love overflowing, taken for granted… taken out the door” Ah! Such wonderful rhythms, lively images, and moving lines here, Shimon.

    Homes hold the stories of our lives…such a haunting poem, Shimon, the whole journey is held here, delicate and sacred, from the buoyancy of beginning, through the energetic “settling” relationships undergo and to the almost-final closing of the door, save for the last question: How to sum it all up and how to say farewell…but you’ve done that beautifully.

    My heart breaks for you if this is really happening. May your art continue to ease and transform the pain as it has here, to the utter beauty this poem offers. It is magnificent, Shimon.

    Gentle peace.

  20. Wonderful piece of very powerful writing Shimon!

  21. Oh my! I’m still having trouble getting past the first paragraph. Spent 1/2 hr trying to find the word that describes your writing in this instance. Awe inspiring.

  22. Very beautiful poem, Mr. Shimon! I hope this is a poem that describes love, ” I swore I’d never leave these walls alive never knowing what it’d feel like after 40 years” is not for real…

  23. I love the way you ended this – when I saw “two words” I was thinking, “How could he sum this up in two words?” And you did, and I know it’s not about being clever but that WAS clever! (And how fortunate to have passion AND perspective, in the second half of one’s life).

  24. The poet. The Shimon that I love.
    Dean and I lived in the Sherwood house for thirty-two years. I think he felt an almost tangible loss when we left that house. (It sat empty for more than a year. We didn’t discuss it.) But, you describe life lived …One man’s life and Everyman’s life.
    Paltry in the scheme of things, huh? As certain as the tides.
    I loved this too, Shimon.

  25. Wow, this is powerful, beautiful, honest poetry, Shimon! It seems very generous of you to share this with us. The rhythm of your frustration and loss.

  26. Extraordinary poem. So much said, so much unsaid but hinted at. From the heart, I can tell. Thanks you for sharing it, Shimon.

  27. I reread the lines over and over as I’m not a poet, but was drawn in. What you wrote was so brutally honest that it captured many emotions we can all feel and relate to. Sad, yet beautiful.
    Leah xx

  28. What beautiful and poetic words. Thought provoking ideas. Words of truth yet thoughtful words. I always love reading your thoughts as they are very inspirational Shimon.

  29. Shimon, I guess we’re all asking you if your poem is literal or figurative. Why are you leaving? We’re hoping that everything is okay with you and yours. We’re hoping that we can keep visiting your delightful place even if we’re not always commenting. Do please talk to us, Shimon.

  30. Time for fresh beginnings, new adventures….best to you, shalom! 🙂

  31. So many feelings, a wealth of neat and tidy description, which hems the curtain to be hung at the window and then drawn.

    Where to next?

    Shimon, a big hug and Shalom.

  32. How utterly beautiful, Shimon.
    Tears in my eyes.

  33. Beautiful Shimon. Thank you. I say this as I place my own treasures between new walls and adjust to a simpler resonance…building again.

  34. A poem full of longing and pathos and beauty. Thank you for sharing it, Shimon.

  35. Reblogged this on Cool lady blog and commented:
    Do read this heartfelt poem with beautiful photographs to accompany it

  36. I have missed your blogs. This is powerful and moving. Thank you so much. Janet

  37. I don’t really know how to react to this poem. It’s beautiful and powerful, but there is such pain and sadness in it.

  38. Your words are full of beauty and sadness. Yet love overrides the sadness. How hard it must be to leave a home so full of memories.

    (Because of a comment you made in a newer post I will share with you that you can see the real me on my welcome page.)

  39. I always read and love your words, but this really is particularly wonderful, and so brave and generous of you to share..I could say so much about it, these feelings feel so familiar to me.. in all the chaos and change of life, sometimes those solid walls are all we have to lean on..so much they see and hear, so much they take in of us..a part of you will always remain there.. you know sometimes I think those kind of spaces, so full of our history, they can contain us too – I hope that your move is an enriching one and the beginning of a new and exciting journey. Thankyou for sharing.

  40. Shimon,
    Your poem describes much of what I am experiencing right now in my life. I know the life your words express. Thank you for sharing your poem.

  41. I am so glad I came here from Angeline’s blog and found this Shimon. What a beautiful description of the countless ordinary moments that make up a life Touched my heart and moved me to tears.

  42. Pingback: Looking Down and More… | The World Is a Book...

  43. Beautiful and powerful!

  44. Your writing is so captivating, Shimon. I was enthralled and also saddened as I read.

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